"The most important moments are the ones that make you realize there’s no turning back. You’ve crossed a line, and you’re stuck on the other side now." -Mickey McAvoy PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *6,800 Gold Bars in 76 Cases not included *Cut and Uncut Diamonds also not included SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"This cap embodies BOTH refined integrity (AKA 'The Platinum Rule' - Treating others the way they want to be treated...) AND incredible physical strength (6-times the density of diamonds). Sensitivity, strength and a shit-ton of money, times 2." -Chicks Dig It PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Number of records sold - "1 million"…
"At the end of 2 years, 'P' dollars invested at an interest 'r' compounded annually increases to an amount, 'A' dollars, given by 'A = P(1 + r)2'. Find the interest rate if $2,000 increased to $2,420 in 2 years. Additionally, factor in those people totally fucked over (TFOx1,000) divided by 'other lives destroyed' (OLD). Write the answer as a…
"Committed to the ongoing scientific analysis of the Double Barrel Double Venturi Ricocheting Vortex Effect and its impact in the treatment of sobriety." -Journal of Medicine PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Ongoing pointless innuendo-laced scientific hypothesis and testing strongly encouraged *Eye drops probably required and hunger to definitely follow SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"With this little blonde hair azure-eyed SoCal beach brat on the brow, the seashore truly is cheaper than therapy. Just don't stare directly into the hat as it may cause permanent ocular meltdown." -my therapist PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *SPF 400 minimum requirement *Absolutely no affiliation with Aryan Racial Ideology - just…
"Hath God forgotten all I have done for Him?" -le Roi Soleil PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Exudes Regality *Not for Peasants *3-Step Process: 1. Pull your royal head out of your own ass. 2. Clean your royal ass off of your head. 3. Rock THE REAL crown. SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"Don’t adjust; just dominate and demoralize." -Beezelbub by the Bay PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap *Flat Bill *Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Alzado-Approved SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says to love your enemy." -The Sultan of Swoon PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap *Flat Bill *Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Complimentary Mob beat-down by moonlit serenade SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"You can get much farther with a kind word and a gun, than you can with a kind word alone." -King Alphonse PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Cement shoes custom made to order *We'll just leave it on the doorstep, then get the hell outta there. SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"Either they don't know...don't show...or don't care about what's goin' on in the hood." -Doughboy PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *1,183 mL of OE for the homies *Known associates - crip slips, white socks and even whiter T-shirts *RICCCKKKKKYYYYYY! SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"Relativity must replace absolutism in the realm of morals as well as in the spheres of physics and biology." -Le Loup Des Mers PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Compensation for unjust declarations of mutiny not included *Squall, tsunami and hurricane tested *Squall, tsunami and hurricane failed SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"A hot dog at the ballgame beats roast beef at the Ritz." -Bogie PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Bats: Left *Throws: Left *Position: Left out *Rally mode: Inside out SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"I believe the only way to reform people is to kill them." -C. Panzram PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *This may seem harsh - but it's "The Kill" not "The Chill" *Let's soften the edges, anyone need a babysitter? SHIPPING: 07.01.23
"Whether you're moving about energetically and constantly, well traveled world-wide, gnawing on the foot of pig, or quite simply find the close association with to the word PENIS to be amusing - then Trotter is your cup of tea. Mom's like it too!" -Conde de Nast PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most *Meadowlark Lemon…
"Heroically leap into a stellar-mass black hole and be subjected to a process called ‘spaghettification’. The black hole’s gravitational force will compress you from toupee to toe nail, while stretching you at the same time…thus, spaghetti." -NASA PRODUCT SPECS: *6-Panel Cap, Flat Bill, Snapback Closure *One Size Fits Most (via Spaghettification) *Containing approximately 4.31 million solar masses *Singularity guaranteed *Listen…
